I don't recall you mentioning Chris so I assumed Doug. Very sorry to hear that Tony, you're right, very sad.

I think Veronica is on the same trip as Chris. Part of the reason we left with my mom still in the hospital. We need to see her one more time. She's in terrible pain, can't see. Hope they both go peacefully.

Sorry to hear about the wrong meds Hank. It seems like they just don't ever listen.


I'll tell you something that really bothers me. When one of my dogs gets this ill, I take him to the vets to be put out of his misery. It is the right thing to do. Period. When I see the suffering and agony that my brother is going through, it just makes no sense to me why I can't do the same for him. If I could, I'd unplug everything that is hooked up to him and tell him goodby. That seems like the "right" thing to do.

I agree Tony. I'm surprised they don't give Chris morphine and pull the ventilator. Let him be comfortable and go peacefully, no reason to make him suffer any longer.

Get yourself a medical wishes form and fill it out. It tells the Drs what you want if you're ever in that situation. Also you and Kathy should each have medical power of attorney for each other. Without those things Drs often try and keep you alive even if there is no hope for recovery.

Prayers and best wishes to all on this thread that things will get better or their suffering will soon be over .
John

This may be the end for my mom. They pulled the tube yesterday and she was alert and doing pretty well, all things considered. Then they called my sister this morning and told her she wasn't breathing enough. Her oxygen levels were dropping and the CO2 was building up in her blood. They wanted to know if needed should they tube her again. We talked about it and I talked to my uncle, her only living sibling. We told them no. If she wants to live bad enough she'll breath but they can't keep sticking a tube down her throat.

She's unresponsive and has been all day. My sister tried to wake her and get a response but nothing. I should be sad but I'm not all that upset about it. She's been miserable and depressed for years. She does absolutely nothing all day long but watch TV and sleep in her chair. Maybe she's decided she's had enough. She has nothing to look forward to and won't make any effort to improve herself. If she's tired of living that way I understand.

Its sad to say but sometimes death is the best cure ,still in my prayers .

Thanks John. Death is part of life, as they say, no one get's out of it alive.

I think maybe she decided she's had enough. If so that's okay and if it's that she's just not strong enough, well I guess that's okay. If there was a chance that she would recover and be healthy that would be different but that's not going to happen. If she does recover she'll be in a nursing home the rest of her life, probably laying in a bed all day. She can't go back to my sister's, they're both in their 60's and can't spend 24 hrs a day taking care of her. Especially when she makes no effort to take care of herself. I know that sounds mean but I just don't want to see her living like she has been any longer.

Doesn't sound mean to me Hank. It sounds like the reasonable way to look at it. Good luck with everything.

Being a caregiver is the toughest task for a family member to deal with and can be more stressful than anyone can imagine .Been there done that and it almost killed Joan in the process .It takes a special kind of person to work with the elderly day in and day out and we met quite a few when Joan's dads time came .He was in a home for about the last month of his life as we could no longer give him the care he deserved and those caregivers took good care of him and loved him the short time he was there.Hank ,I wish I could give you some words of comfort but I think you are in a good place in your heart already .
John

Hank it is so hard to read about your mom, I can't imagine what you have gone through. I agree with John, it sounds like you have prepared yourself for we might think is the worst. But if she has given up, as you have said, then maybe she has made peace with her existence her on Earth. For your sake and hers, I hope that she doesn't suffer anymore.

Tony, I had an uncle who passed of bone cancer in the early 80's. We watched this energetic man be reduced to nothing and was in pain constantly. I am sorry for your pain, I cannot imagine losing a sibling. Please let us know how both of you are doing.