Have to vent
 

Finally got a job that gives me more time off, like holidays I have never had before. So I planned some project to get done this weekend since the weather was going to be so nice. Back in December you all heard me say I had brought our daughter home, and the family is still living with us. Well on Saturday morning as I got up early and was taking a shower getting ready to head to the beach house, I was informed I was baby sitting all day and could not leave. I did mention I had plans, but was told I was being selfish. I stayed and did what Grandpa's do. Went down on Sunday and now I'm a day behind. Got a call this morning at the beach that I needed to be home in the early afternoon to baby sit again. I'm seeing a pattern here, since I'm the only one who has the weekends off, they are figuring I can baby sit, including my wife saying it. I love my grandchildren, but need my weekends to get things done. No one else is helping me out. So Im I wrong in my thinking? May be I need to do more for a while. Sorry for the long post.

On a side note, you see what a 55 pound dog does to your house and yard. Plus my daughter and family have taken over every room in the house, and when I try to say something my wife tells me to put a lid on it. You have to remember I have been on the road for the last 30 years and my wife is the queen of the house. Lol

No your not wrong. Calling you selfish. What is that.

Clue them in who's child it is. They knew you were busy and took advantage of you.

My kid is 7 and he never been with grandma. Unless grandma wants to do something. She calls and makes plans.

One of us takes care of him at all times. We tag team it. Kinda what parents do.

I think your daughter should plan better for child care and not rely on you .

Time to put your foot down. A guy needs time off from family.

I don't think you're wrong. Just because they live with you doesn't mean you've become their babysitter. They should be grateful you're providing a place to stay. I can see babysitting on occasion, if they ask, not demand and when you have time. I think I would let them know exactly how you feel.

You are a more patient man than I am Ray. I would have already blown up and told everyone to kiss my ass. My mother gets very demanding at times, and unfortunately - I've had to be short with her and put my foot down. I don't deal well with anyone trying to boss me around or take me for granted.

All that said, I'm not the best one to give advice... however I find that "think faster than you speak" works best for me in most situations.

I'm trying to be patient, but I like having my free time since the kids had all moved out. Plus right now we have two house stuff into one. Can hardly move through the house it seems. I like a neat clean house.

I would go with.....I found you a baby sitter...here is the number...see you guys later.

What he said ^ :D

Ray, is your Daughter a single Mom or did her Husband come with her to live in YOUR house? Are they working, do they help out around the house, do they offer any financial help..........I'm thinking NO on these 3 questions. Your vent is well justified and warranted.

You deserve your own free time to do whatever you please.

Husband is with her. Both now have jobs, and in fact my daughter makes more an hour then I do. They have been buying food for the house. The original plan was they would get settled with there jobs and start looking for a place. But now I'm hearing some friends are coming the end of May and they wanted to know if the could use the spare bedroom. I'm all for helping out, but this might be a little longer then I planned for. If nothing else the beach house is getting lots done, since I need to get away on the weekends. Lol. Can't wait for summer. Lots of car activities to go too. I think the the hardest part is not being able to go home a relax. Always something needs to be done or hard to find some quiet time. Garage is full of furniture now, so going out there to do something is hard to do. Our house looks like a hoarders house right now. You have to walk around all the stuff. I was not expecting them to unpack so much stuff. Looks to me they are planning to stay awhile. We will be talking this weekend, to see what the plan is. If my wife has her way, she wants them to stay awhile.

Ray I was in a situation years ago when I divorced my first husband and had to move home. I was a single mom and my mother told me that if I wanted her to babysit then I had to have a schedule as soon as I got mine and that she would charge me to watch her grand kids and that was not included in what she was charging me for rent. Now some people might consider this mean. It wasn't, I was an adult who made some decisions that put me there.

I think that your daughter and son in law are taking full advantage of you.
1) They are both working and should put their stuff in storage so you can have your home back
2) Child care is something that they need to find. They cannot assume that you gave up your life to care for their child even if it is your grand child.
3) You need to set some guidelines. It is your house and they are guests.

Maybe I am sounding harsh, but I had my son home from Texas over the holidays and our kids are different after they become adults and live on their own. We love them but they are different.

Ray ,family issues really suck sometimes like what you are dealing with .We are currently trying to deal with my wife's brothers trying to guilt us into giving them access to their land behind ours which will destroy our frontage and cause all kinds of drainage issues that will probably flood my shop. I am willing to let them cross my property behind our house but it will require them to go through a prime piece of their property that they want to sell . They just dont care if they destroy what we have and it aint going to happen.

Almost 6 months and the kids are still here. Do enjoy seeing the granddaughter change. I missed a lot of that with my kids and me being on the road. They just started looking for a house, but don't think they are really ready to buy one. Im guessing it will be a year before they move. I will just have to wait it out. Glad I got weekends off, so I can get away.

If you're willing to wait it out, okay. If not, you need to say something. Can't tell you what to do, that's on you. All I can say is you do have the right to speak your mind.