Wednesday Humor

[1969 El Camino Dan]

An elderly couple had been experiencing declining memories, so they decided to take a power-memory class to learn how to remember things by association.
A few days after the class, the old man was outside talking with his neighbor about how much the class helped him.
"What was the name of the instructor?" asked the neighbor.
"Oh, ummmm, let's see," the old man pondered. "You know that flower, you know, the one that smells really nice but has those prickly thorns, what's that flower's name?"
"A rose?" asked the neighbor.
"Yes, that's it," replied the old man. He turned to the house and shouted, "Hey, Rose, what's the name of the instructor we took the memory class from?

Dan

[jnorton]

Now that's funny!

[Chicken Coupe]

Ever since I was a child, I’ve had a fear of someone under my bed at night. So I went to a shrink and told him, ‘I’ve got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there’s somebody under it. I’m scared. I think I’m going crazy.’

‘Just put yourself in my hands for one year,’ said the shrink. ‘Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears..’

‘How much do you charge?’ ‘Eighty dollars per visit,’ replied the doctor. ‘I’ll sleep on it,’ I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street. ‘Why didn’t you come to see me about those fears you were having?’ he asked.

‘Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup!’

‘Is that so!’ With a bit of an attitude he said, ‘and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?’

‘He told me to...



















cut the legs off the bed! – Ain’t nobody under there now!!!’

[Hank70SS]

Those are both pretty good.

A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him.

She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator. He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out. Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.

Shortly before landing in New York , she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in New Orleans , please raise your hand?"

Not one hand went up ... so she took them home and ate them.

Two lessons here:

1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are.
2. Blondes aren't as dumb as most folks think

[Chicken Coupe]

GOOD one!

Hi Gary!