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#1
03-30-2013, 06:37 PM
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Well this sucks!
So we went to FL in February to visit my mom, sister and brother-in-law and enjoy the nice weather. My mom lives with them. Long story short my mom ended up in the hospital with an intestinal blockage. They did surgery and it was caused by adhesion's, scar tissue, from an old surgery. She doesn't do well with anesthesia or pain killers so they had to intubate her, you know tube down the throat so the machine can breath for you. Well they pulled the tube on Wednesday and she looked and sounded 100% better. It was time for us to leave so we left Thursday morning, got home last night. My sister called today, she's back in ICU, they had to intubate her again this morning. My sister was furious, she went to the hospital to see her and that's when she found out, they didn't even call her. She does have medical power of attorney.
So I don't know, I may sound like a prick but my mom has done this to herself. I love her, I don't want to see her suffer but she's her own worst enemy. She had a knee replaced over 10 years ago and wouldn't follow through with the therapy. She had back surgery 5 or 6 years ago and wouldn't follow through with the therapy. She had her other knee replaced about 3 years, go ahead and guess if she followed through with the therapy. She's over 250 lbs of fat and absolutely zero muscle and she wonders why she hurts so much? I know, I'm her son, I should have some sympathy but she won't listen to anybody. She won't get up and move, just sits in a chair all day. Maybe get's up 2 or 3 times, I'd rather shoot myself. Oh, it hurts, I can't do it. Well I've had multiple intestinal surgeries, fractured my pelvis in 3 places a year and half ago but I never stayed down. Okay, enough of that. I feel sorry for her but I'm also mad at her because she's given up. She's miserable and wants to die but she's afraid of dieing. Call me what you will but I wish she would slip silently into the night. I can't stand to see her live like this anymore. If that's not bad enough, some of you may remember this post from October 2010. http://chevelleforum.org/showthread....light=Veronica I've not kept you updated on Veronica's condition. It's sad and depressing, I could write a book on what's she's endured in the last 2 1/2 years. The amazing thing is she's remained Veronica, positive, upbeat and a joy to be around. Well we fear this is the end for this sweet child. After the breast surgery they found cancer in the lymph nodes and she had more surgery. Then cancer in the bone and now in the brain. She came home, her mom's house, a few days ago. She can't see and she's in terrible pain. I think this is it. We'll go see her on Monday, probably the last time we see her. Our son said he's want's to pay for her funeral. Veronica has nothing, she hasn't worked in over a year and lot's of medical bills, her mom has nothing either. Her father died a number of years ago and her mom has had a stroke and is broke. He, our son, is starting to make some money now but still has school loans to pay off. I don't know, just a bad situation and he thinks enough of her to do this. Please don't take this wrong, this is not a fund raiser and I'm not looking for donations, it's just sad. What I would like is a prayer or kind thought for Veronica. She's a special person and will be missed. Sorry for the depressing and boring news. Sometimes you just need to tell a friend or friends. 
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#2
03-30-2013, 06:41 PM
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I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. We will keep you and your family in our prayers.
Vent all you want, that is what friends are for.
__________________
Ray 1970 SS Chevelle Van Nuys Built Last edited by shadowgray396; 03-30-2013 at 06:43 PM.
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#3
03-30-2013, 08:40 PM
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Wow! That DOES suck. If it's any consolation, I know how you feel. We went down to Florida a few weeks ago to visit my parents. My dad said he wanted to give me his milling machine. GIVE. I thought this was strange, so we went down, more to check on them than get the mill. Turns out my mom has kidney cancer and my dad had two more strokes he didn't think were a big deal.
Your family is in our thoughts as well.
__________________
Alan 1964 Chevelle SS Speed's expensive, how fast do you want to go?
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#4
03-30-2013, 09:04 PM
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Wow ,sorry to hear about your mom ,but if she has given up there's little anyone can do. When my father in law had Alshimers(sp) ,at the end we hoped and prayed that God would take him in his sleep .I remember Veronica from the last time you talked about her and so sorry to hear her plight . You have prayers from us to you and your extended family ,keep in touch.
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John
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#5
03-30-2013, 09:17 PM
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Hank, you can vent anytime, especially about this. I wish there was words that I could type here that could ease some of your pain. There just isn't. But I can say that your mom has lived her life, and like you said, she makes her own decisions..one of them is sitting in her chair all day. All you can do is be there for her, talk to her listen to her, and maybe she will listen to you one day and get up and move. I am fortunate to have my mother close to us. But I am also the one of her 6 kids that she has asked to make the hard decisions if she ever becomes incapacitated. My mom is like my best friend and I told her that I don't know if I would be able to when the time comes. I will keep you and your mom in my prayers.
Veronica is lucky to have your son in her life. You said that he still has school loans to pay for, but paying for her funeral may be something that he needs to do, for himself. You won't know for sure until the time comes, but such a sad story... Please let us know how you and your family are doing...
__________________
Get in, sit down, shut up, hold on...cause Ms Grumpy is driving ! For the audio geek try: www.audiokarma.org
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#6
03-31-2013, 05:32 AM
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I feel for you Hank. I'm going to the ICU this morning to see my brother. It could very well be the last time that I see him alive. Full of bone cancer, on a ventilator. Not a pretty site. Hang in there Hank, Lynda, and Henry.
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#7
03-31-2013, 09:41 AM
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Quote:
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#8
03-31-2013, 10:16 AM
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Well I found out why they sent my mom back to the ICU and tubed her again. I called the hospital and spoke to her nurse, asked her to go through her chart and see if they gave her any pain meds prior to sending her back to ICU. Sure enough, they gave her dilaudid around midnight Friday, back to ICU at 6:30 AM Saturday.
Dumb asses! Dilaudid is 10 times as strong as morphine, there's no reason she needed something that strong. We warned the Drs and nurses when she went in the hospital, we warned them every time we spoke with them. She's 86 and has zero muscle, she can't metabolize anesthetics or pain killers. They shut her whole body down. They also had no excuse for not calling someone when her condition changed. I confirmed they have my sister's house #, cell #, my brother in-laws cell#, my cell# and Lynda's cell#. Next F up and shits going to hit the fan.
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#9
03-31-2013, 09:49 AM
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Not Doug Hank. Chris, who is a couple of years younger than me. I just got back from the hospital. He can barely wiggle his toes to communicate but he is all but dead now. Sad I tell ya, sad. I sure as hell hope I have a good strong heart attack and drop dead. Or someone shoots me between the eyes.
I wish the best for Veronica.
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#10
03-31-2013, 11:24 AM
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I think Veronica is on the same trip as Chris. Part of the reason we left with my mom still in the hospital. We need to see her one more time. She's in terrible pain, can't see. Hope they both go peacefully.
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