The Seven Degrees of Blond

[Ms Grumpy]

FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang
at 2 in the
morning.The very blonde wife picked up the phone,
listened a moment and said
'How should I know, that's 200 miles
from here!' and hung up.
The
husband said, 'Who was that?'

The wife answered, 'I don't know,
some woman wanting to know
if the coast is clear.'


SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the

sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the
mirror
and says, 'Hmm, this person looks familiar.'

The second
blonde says, 'Here, let me see!'

So, the first blonde hands her
the compact.

The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You
dummy, it's me!'


THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her
boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun. She goes to
his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in
the arms
of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to
take out
the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the
gun and
puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do
it!!!'

The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're
next!'


FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her
knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, . I know
'em all.'

A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?'


The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy it's W.'



FIFTH DEGREE
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he
told her she was pregnant?

A: 'Is it mine?'


SIXTH
DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US

Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what
Roe vs.
Wade was about.

Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said,
'That was the decision
George Washington had to make before he crossed the
Delaware .'


SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a
blonde was shocked to find her house
ransacked and burglarized. She
telephoned the police at once and
reported the crime. The police dispatcher
broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was
the
first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with
his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the
sight of
the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in
her hands,
she moaned, 'I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the
police
for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND
policeman!'